When desire starts to fade in a couple, tantra offers new paths to sexual fulfillment. According to various sources, the origins of this spiritual Indian practice go back to between 3000 BC and 500 AD. The practice is inspired by Buddhist and Hindu texts. Notably through yoga and meditation, the goal of tantra is an “awakened” sexuality and increased sexual pleasure.
Tantric sex: breathe in unison
In terms of sex, the tantric method means that the person first focuses on their own pleasure, and then seeks ecstasy with a partner. The idea is that if we are more present for ourselves, then we are equally more there for our partners. Work to get your breathing in tandem with the other person, which intimately reconnects both of you.
Slow down the rhythm, and get into “slow sex” mode
In order to reach ecstasy, the woman generally needs more time and gentleness than her male partner. According to Bhagvati Granier, a teacher of tantra, it is necessary to slow down the movements in order to create more intense sensations during sex.
“Putting slowness into the sex act is a fundamental part of tantra and Taoism”, according to Alain Héril, a sex therapist and coach on the subject.
In tantric philosophy and Hindu mythology, Shiva, the most highly revered god, falls in love with Shakti, the goddess of creative feminine power. The lovers work on their energies to bring pleasure and joy to each other. While Shiva helps Shakti perfect her yoga practice in order to guide her towards her final liberation, Shakti also initiates Shiva into his path to ultimate liberation, by fusing their minds and bodies.
In tantra, it is the woman who takes the initiative in terms of sexual positions. Listening to her desires, she chooses the rhythm and the movements. Sex can therefore last longer, as she can slow down or stop certain movements in order to delay their respective orgasms.
Tantric sex: energy joy and pleasure are the key words
To prevent the evaporation of desire, tantra recommends that the couple takes on new habits that involve more joy and vitality. “When these two elements are not on the table, there is a good bet that the energy is not circulating, which hinders our sexuality, and with it, our availability for pleasure“, explains Bhagvati Granier.
When tantric methods are correctly applied, both consciously and willingly by the couple, they can lead to more prolonged and more intense orgasms than traditional orgasms. Men and women alike who practice tantric sex claim to have all the sensations of a classic orgasms, only that it can last longer: from several minutes to several hours, which makes it far more intense.