Relationships are not always easy, especially when routine sets in, which can happen in any couple as the years go on. If you are in a relationship and want to make sure that it lasts as long as possible, here are 10 expert recommendations!
It’s well known that communication forms the basis of healthy relationships, be they romantic relationships, familial relationships, friendships or relationships with colleagues. To make your relationship last as long as possible, there is nothing more important than talking and expressing your feelings, be they positive or negative. Make sure you regularly share your emotions, desires, hopes, plans, worries and disappointments.
2) Keep the spark alive
This recommendation is also well known, but not always easy to follow. When the passion of the early stages starts to die out over the years, routine can set in, and obligations and responsibilities tend to take over daily life (picking up the kids, preparing meals, doing the laundry, doing the housework, etc.). The humdrum tasks of daily life can take up a great deal of time, and lead a relationship into a rut, leaving both partners bored and possibly even feeling indifferent. To prevent this from happening to you, take the time to nurture passion and romance in your relationship. Regularly make time to go with your other half to a restaurant, to the cinema, out for a walk or on a weekend away. Avoid staying cocooned up at home!
3) Love = Respect
If you really love your partner, it seems logical that you would respect them, and respect their needs and personal desires. Advising you to stay calm at difficult times may seem obvious, but everyone has their own personality, and reacts differently to crisis situations. For example, some people are more jealous than others. In order to feel loved and supported, you must first feel respected.
4) Everyone needs their own space
Doing things together is all well and good, but it is important that you also do regular separate activities, so that you will have things to talk about. Go out with friends or spend a little time on your own, go for a weekend away without your partner -you’ll be all the happier to see them again afterwards!
5) Carpe Diem
If you spend a lot of time going back over old fights, or bringing up mistakes your partner made months ago, you are likely to stay feeling angry and/or insecure, which could make it difficult for you both to live with each other. Draw a line under the past and make the most of the present moment while you are together. Make the most of it by doing an activity you both enjoy, for example.
6) Give before you expect to receive
There are two key proverbs on this matter: “Who gives to me, teaches me to give.” a Dutch proverb” and “Give cheerfully with one hand and you will gather well with two” a Lash proverb. Spoil your other half with attention -for example, say something nice to them at the end of the day, make them a home made meal or their favourite dessert, let your imagination go to try and surprise them!
7) Make plans together
There is nothing like planning for shared goals or family projects to bring a couple together. You may be planning for a weekend away, a holiday, a particular activity (maybe a hike or a skydive), a training course or making an important purchase, such as a house. Regardless of what they are, any sort of plans are great for sharing your dreams with your partner. Additionally, you will both be motivated to find ways to achieve these goals and dreams, and making plans also projects you both into a shared future.
8) Learn to admit when you are wrong
Like in any relationship you have in your life, you need to be able to admit fault, or apologise when you have gone too far. If you have hurt or upset your partner, it is normal to ask for their forgiveness. It is also one of the best ways of solidifying your relationship.
9) Support your partner
In a relationship, we need to feel that the other person is there for us, otherwise we can start to wonder what they are there for! If you want your relationship to last, you both need to support one another through thick and thin. Each person should be able to count on the other if there is a problem or if they are feeling blue.
10) Make intimacy a top priority
Even if the passion is dying or if you are tight for time, being intimate with your partner is also one of the keys to helping your relationship survive in the long term. Cultivate intimacy and make time for sex.