Depending on the position you and your partner sleep in, it is possible to tell what type of relationship you have! During your sleep, your unconscious is most active, and it controls your body language. It can be a way of understanding how things are in your relationship. American psychologist Patti Wood knows how to decode your unconscious body language and that of your partner. She explains all!
Entwined spoons: a happy couple
According to the psychologist Patti Wood, when your partner wraps themselves around you like this, it makes you feel warm and protected. If the part below your pelvis makes contact with your partner’s pelvic area, this indicates that you trust them. If you are the one with your arms around your partner, you are the protective one in the relationship. All the signs indicate that you have a happy relationship and a fulfilled sex life.
Spoons at a distance: equilibrium
You both sleep on the same side but you stay a few centimeters away from one another. Your partner is behind you to show that you can count on him or her. In this position, you show your desire to maintain a balance between wanting to stay connected and wanting to be in a comfortable sleeping position. When the person who is “the little spoon” moves away from their partner, that simply indicates that they need a little space. If your other half tends to “eat into” your space to get closer to you during the night, this is a sign of possessiveness.
The pretzel: intimacy
The pretzel position is also called “the honeymoon embrace”. When you sleep face to face, in partial or full body contact with one another, it is both a very intimate and rare sleeping position. It signifies intense emotions, such as those experienced just after having sex, or at the beginning of a romantic relationship. If your faces touch, that shows that you want to stay in physical contact even throughout the night, as the day is not long enough to enjoy your partner’s presence. If the man puts his leg over his partner’s, that can be a sign of trust or of carnal desire. If you only stay in this position for a few minutes, your love is true but you have a need for independence.
The shield, or sleeping on your stomach
According to Patti Wood, when one partner sleeps on their stomach, it means that they feel the need to protect the front of their bodies from potential aggression. This position can be a sign of anxiety, of vulnerability or a lack of self-confidence, except in the cases of people who suffer from back or neck problems. People who have difficulty dealing with their emotions or stress during the day need to protect the vulnerable parts of their bodies during sleep. This position is often linked to trauma or past stress. If your partner suddenly starts sleeping on their stomach, you can put your arms around them to reassure them.
The shield combined with the climber position
This position relates more to men than to women and can be a signal of severe stress. Similar to sleeping on the stomach, in this situation the man sleeps on his back but protects his body with his arms. He tilts his head towards his partner while keeping his arms folded. Unconsciously, he wants to be in contact with her but he remains on his back, beside her, with his head at a lower level than his partner’s. In this position, the woman takes the dominant role in the relationship.
Sweetheart’s cradle, protection guaranteed!
According to Patti Wood, when your partner places their head on your chest, it’s a sign of trust. When it is your partner who sleeps on their back, cradling your head on their chest, it shows that they want to protect you. But, if you are both in the foetal position facing one another, it shows that you are dependent on one another. However, if you sleep with your head on their chest and the rest of your body is spread out beside theirs, it shows that you want to make your own decisions.
If you sleep at the same level by comparison to the head of the bed, it shows that you are on the same wavelength.
Each person with their own side of the bed
If you each sleep on your own sides of the bed, this means that you are both independent and that you want to be more separate. If you usually want to be in physical contact during the night, this position could indicate that something is not right, like stress at work or a problem in the relationship, for example. In any case, many couples start out by cuddling to heat up or show affection, but return to their own sides of the bed to have more space, to avoid feeling the other person’s cold feet or hearing their snores, or to avoid being kicked in the night! Skin to skin contact can also be too warm under the covers and can prevent you from sleeping well.
Keep in mind that some couples get on better when they stop trying so hard to stay snuggled up all night, because they benefit from having slept more deeply and without interruptions.